Wednesday, January 18th, 2012Weather
A frosty cloudy morning, with a slight chance of snow. Windy as temperatures drop further into the evening. High -3°C and a low of -8°C (27deg;F/18°F)Current Moon Phase:
Morning sirens go off at 9:03am, and evening sirens are at 5:43 pm.News
- Gossip columns are abuzz about Neveah Knorr's controversial blog post about the bombing of Tower Apartments. At first it read like any celebrity commentary to a tragedy: "So sad what happened to the Tower Apartments. As a newcomer I cant [sic] help but feel connected to this tragedy. This is the time for everyone to extend their condolences and be extra kind to the downtrodden newcomers. And to you newcomers out there, don't let this get you down!! You can still make a life here if you work hard and believe in your dreams. I made it, so can you!!"
Neveah Knorr went on to promise a percentage of her next self-help book, dropping this Valentine's Day, to helping rebuild the apartments. When various bloggers and commenters suggested that her fellow newcomers would be better served with assistance in hauling the rubble or safe, comfortable temporary shelter, Knorr closed the blog to comments. The next blog posting was a short video clip of her long-time friend and rumored on-and-off-again girlfriend, Judy Wallace, cooing over the baby otter at McKinley Zoo. When contacted about her generous offer, Knorr's publisher and chief editors refused all calls.
Neveah Knorr is a well-known self-help guru and bona fide Siren's Port celebrity, most easily recognized by her large, feathered wings. Her bestselling novel, The Heaven Within Your Reach
focuses on her adjustment to Siren's Port after being Pulled from a heavenly paradise, and focuses on values of self-reliance and a by-the-bootstraps approach to life. The title of her latest self-help book has not yet been released to the press.
- Snow Shoveling Robotics Rentals
SERO is offering a 15% discount on monthly service plans. Our friendly automatons will dig you out twice daily on any snowday! Contact our toll free number for a property estimate.
- There is a report of telekinetic domestic abuse, wherein Lillian Finkley (45) is accused of assaulting her husband Martin (42) with a whole pot rack’s worth of pots and pans when he interrupted her about grocery lists during the dramatic reveal of her favorite daytime Soap Opera, causing her to miss the show’s announcement of who the father of Megara Clint’s purple-skinned baby really was. Martin has been treated for a concussion at SERO hospital, and has not yet announced any plans to file for divorce.
- The author of this week’s new non-fiction bestseller, Phony Fad Diets and Other Grifting Gimmicks
, printed by AGI’s publishing company, contains a number of witty and anecdotal critiques on SERO’s extensive history of cure-alls that don’t work or have shady development history. A chapter on the recent recall of Pig Out
has this book flying off the shelves, through SERO has announced intent to sue for libelous statements which are supported by urban legends and popular conspiracies, rather than fact.
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